Lone Ranger No More

Dear Sammy,

For seven happy years, I have been the only pet in the family. Well, ok, there is the bird, but I like to think of him as emergency rations if we ever get snowed in for a month. But last month, apparently someone thought it would be a good idea to have a field trip to the local shelter, and wouldn’t you know it, we end up with a kitten. Suddenly, it’s “Cleo this” and “Cleo that.” Everything she does is just “sooo cute!” As if it takes a pedigree to bat a feather around. Give me a break. The worst thing is she wants to be with me all the time. She’s always shoving her face in my food dish, pushing her way onto my chair when I’m trying to nap, and grooming me every chance she gets. Ok, that feels good, but there’s more important things than feeling good, like feeling superior.

How do I convince my family that one cat is enough? I’m sure there are other places who would love to have a cute kitten, because she is cute, even though she’s annoying. I just want to go back to my undisturbed days of napping and eating.

Crowded in Cisco Grove

Dear Crowded,

I have to tell you, you’re stuck with Cleo. For some reason, humans are fascinated by small things. The “that’s so cute!” reaction is entirely voluntary, and science hasn’t yet found a cure. Many behaviorists believe it is a survival mechanism. How else can you explain the survival of dogs. If they didn’t know how to do cute tricks, how long do you think they would last.

That said, it’s not all bad news. Another cat n the house can be quite useful. Aside from the grooming, they are a nice heater on those cold nights. And, the reason Cleo wants to be around you all the time, is because she thinks you are all-knowing. So teach her things. Like, how to warm up your bed before you’re ready to use it, and how to retrieve your ball when you want to bat it around, but don’t want to get up to fetch it. Kittens are also good scapegoats. Want to know something over, go ahead and do it when Cleo’s around Your people will naturally assume the kitten doesn’t know any better and neither of you will get into trouble.

I, like you, was once the only cat in the house, and now I live with four other cats. It was a struggle at first, but now we get along quite nicely. And, you’ll find when everyone’s at school or work, it’s sometimes nice to have company.

Enjoy your new sister.

Sammy