Strange Doings

I apologize for the length of time it has been since my last post. I was very busy knocking things off of counters and fell behind on my nap quota. I'm all caught up now, and am looking forward to getting back on schedule dispensing wise advice to my fellow cats. So, if you are one of the cats who are still waiting for an answer, you should be seeing it here soon. - Sammy
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My person is usually pretty sane, but once a year she goes through a phase of multiple personalities. I’m not sure what’s going on with her, but it seems like every day, she’s a different person. Sometimes her hair is green and long, and the next day, it will be red and short. The other night, I wasn’t even sure it was her. She had a white face with black eyes, and went around cackling all night at a bunch of kids who came to the door. Oh, by the way, they were all dressed strange, too. This goes on for about a week, and then she’s back to normal for another year. Should I be worried? I've attached a picture of one of her more unusual looks.

Puzzled in Petaluma

Dear Puzzled,

This is not a new phenomenon , and it’s not unique to your person. For decades prominent psy-cat-atrists have studied this reoccurring behavior in people, and have discovered the reason for it. People wish they were cats. It’s true. Every person has feelings in inadequacy because the recognize the superiority of cats, and know they can never be on the same level. Even though we cats recognize this flaw and don’t hold it against them, for some people, sometimes it gets too hard to bear and they have to do something.

When your person dresses strangely, she is trying to shake off her feelings of cat envy by transforming herself into a new creature. Once transformed, she needs to assert her new status with others, and so will go mingle with similarly decked out people, or in the case of children (you can see this syndrome starts young) who don’t have cars will go door to door to show off their new personas. This need to be something other than what they are eventually wears off as they realize they can never achieve the perfection of cats, and they revert to their normal selves and just enjoy being around us.

For most people, this is a once a year occurrence and they get it out of their systems within a week or two. However, some people have more serious cases. For them, there is no cure. Luckily, there are places where they can go and live with like-minded people. The most famous of these colonies are in Hollywood and New York. There’s even one treatment center where the people dress, and really think they are, cats. Be grateful your person is of the once a year variety.

Be patient with her and good luck.

Sammy

Lazy Legs

Dear Sammy,

I think I may be allergic to my people. Every time they come near me, my legs collapse and I end up on my back. I worry it may be a problem with my stomach because as soon as someone rubs it, everything is fine again. Is it possible to be allergic to people? It only happens when one or both of my people are in the room with me, and it happens with both of them. Right now, it only happens when I’m safely inside, but I’m concerned that it may get worse. What happens if my legs suddenly give out when I’m chasing a bird, or worse, being chased by that big dog next door? If it gets worse, could I end up paralyzed.

Have you ever heard of this malady before?

Worried in Weimar


Dear Worried,

You can stop fretting. You don’t have some mysterious disease. It’s not a disease, nor is it mysterious. On the contrary, it’s quite common in cats who have good homes. You have what is known as RMBS, or Rub My Belly Syndrome. When someone you love approaches, your body reacts to what you want without you having to think about it, and what you want is a good belly rub. You’re never disappointed, are you? It’s a scientific fact that people cannot walk by a furry tummy without giving it a good rub. They are complementary instincts that have developed in cats and people over millions of years.

Don’t worry that it will happen at an awkward time. You will only experience this reaction when you are in a secure place, so roll over and enjoy it. It’s nothing but good. You get a good belly rub, and the bond between you and your people gets stronger.

Enjoy!

Sammy

New Year's Musing

Dear Readers,

As we start a new year, I want to take the time to reflect on the things that have made me happy this year.

I like when my person sleeps late on weekends. We cuddle up on the bed and watch the Food Network until we see something we want to make for brunch. It usually involves bacon.

My brothers and sister make me happy because I can almost always blame one of them when I do something perfectly acceptable to me, but not so much to my people.

Winter makes me happy because there’s always a fire by which to relax. Spring makes me happy because that’s when there are plenty of birds to watch through the window. Summer makes me happy because it’s naturally a lazy time. And Autumn makes me happy because it smells so good.

I like watching Animal Planet, especially “It’s Me or the Dog.” Too bad they always choose the dog.

I love movie night because it means popcorn. I love popcorn!

I’m happy that there are cat beds and cushion strategically located all through the house. I never have to go far when I feel a nap attack coming on.

Mostly, I’m grateful for my people. Despite some of their silly rules (stay off the kitchen counters) they were easy to train and are great to have around.

Happy New Year to Cats, People and even Dogs!

Sammy